It's taken a while, but I am finally becoming the person that I was meant to be; the real Cat, if I may be so bold. It's not that I haven't been myself all these times... well, actually, I don't believe that I have been myself at all. I think the person I really am is too intense for most people. The person that I really am is passionate about all things, whether that passion be negative or positive. Some people say that I am intense. YES! I AM!! and thats a good thing, at least in my book. Mediocre people are boring. They blend it. I am a creation of the living God. I BETTER STAND OUT!!
There is another thing about me that most people don't understand. I hate getting complimented on my singing voice. It has nothing to do with the quality of my voice, because I know I have a nice voice (and that wasn't meant to sound cocky at all), but it has to do where the attention for that voice is going. I've realized recently that the reason why I've hated being told that was because God wasn't getting the recognition for my voice, I was. And thats not why I sing. I sing to bring people closer to him, I sing to connect with him more, and I sing just to show off God's creativity. I don't want any credit for my voice, because I don't sing for it to be a way for me to feel better, its all for him.
I've recently been thinking about how we are supposed to bring Heaven to Earth, not people to Heaven. I mean, we're supposed to do that too, but Heaven is supposed to be here. Jesus is here, now! Its not like we have to wait 2000 more years for this to happen. He's here! The Spirit is here, and we're acting like its totally out of our reach, thats its not going to happen while we're here. I've been thinking about that, and how the Heaven's open up when we worship and am finding myself with the image of the ceiling of the church opening and the clouds opening and the praises just rising and have a straight passage to Heaven. Its as if God is having all of the worship in Heaven stop so he is able to delight in the praise that He is being given by his people on Earth... its a beautiful image for me.
Read Isaiah 42... its amazing. If you're really inspired.. listen to Misty Edward's song "People Get Ready." Very powerful.
btw... Misty Edwards is amazing. Just thought I would put a plug in for her... :)
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